We glided across the dance floor, flowing with ease, poise and grace, to the sound of the music. I felt like I was floating on a cloud, a cloud full of love and happiness.
I loved dancing with him, I loved being in his arms, it always felt so loving, a beautiful comfort and strong.
My wedding gown was the one of my dreams, rich cream, off the shoulders with a bodice of lace and pearls, the skirt was a full circle held in position with hoops.
My chief bridesmaid said it looked like something out of Gone with the Wind. On reflection, there was something in those words, something I didn't know.
Princess for a day, I was floating in happiness, in love.
I was old enough, old enough to know.
We glided across the dance floor, I beamed the biggest smile as he asked " Are you happy?" I replied, "Oh, yes Dad, I am very happy".
It was my happiest moment of the whole night, in fact, it was the only happy moment of the night.
I was sure that I was old enough to know, to make a well-founded choice after all I was in my mid-thirties and had been around the block a couple of times with love, in love. I was old enough to know this time!
The thing was that I wasn't, I didn't know what I was walking into. And very soon it became evident that I didn't know. I wasn't old enough.
Years on I know now that such phrases are a great way to appease the mind and ease the burden of heartbreak. To pardon oneself from ignoring the signs, the subtle whispers and gentle nudges that come from deep within.
When things became unbearable and I made the decision to end the marriage then I knew I had seen all the signs, heard the subtle whispers and felt them in my body.
Frequent unexplained pain, injuries, hurting myself through what seemed clumsiness, and not paying attention to what I was doing, were all explained as "accidents".
I was old enough, I did know but I didn't listen!
Learning to see the signs, hearing the subtle whispers of guidance from our soul, and paying attention to what our physical body is telling us is how we can live a soul-led life. I have found over the years that living a soul-led life is one of peace, ease, joy and harmony.
Learning to hear guidance from the Angelic realm and Guides is an amazing way to live our lives. It is wondrous and powerful.
Now I truly can say I know not that I am old enough for we are always old enough.
Age is not the deciding factor in knowing what is for our highest good.
Age has nothing to do with it, it is choice and how we decide to use our free will.
A child instinctively knows what is best for them but the choice to use their intuition
is most often not available because of the family rules, expectations, and what is permitted.
I know that to say words like I didn't know or how was I to know is an easy way out.
A way to pardon ourselves. And as with all things in this world, our choices come with consequences. And when we choose not to listen to the gentle whispers and nudges, not paying attention to the messages of the body, the consequence is pain, struggle and hardship.
I know now that to learn to live a soul-led life is the path of joy, wonder, love, peace, harmony and healing.
I invite you to try these simple daily steps to move towards living your life through the wisdom of your soul.
Make time for yourself to sit in a quiet place where you feel at ease, begin with 5 minutes.
Take time in the shower to feel your body and know what it is like to sense it deeply.
Begin your day by making space in your spine so that the energy of Divine essence can flow through you.
Pray, not beg and plead but pray with gentle loving compassion, and ask to be guided for your highest good in all that you do today.
Close the day with gratitude for all that has been in the day.
Blessings to you
Gwenda
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